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Funny File Archive
Click the links below to view archived Hathaway Funny Files.
'Skunk Spoiled Apples' 3 Part Story 05.01.05 'Sttwwb and the Swamp' 3 Part Story
'The Ghost of Smorgus Dohlman' 3 Part Story
'Judy's Decision' 3 Part Story
'The Mighty Hero of Ireland' 3 Part Story
'How well do you know us?' Trivia Game
'What do these things have in common?' Riddles
'What am I?' Rhyming Christmas Riddles by Shelly
'Spys' Outdoor Game
'The Color Game' Outdoor Game
'Vanish' Outdoor Game
'Freeze-Man Dodgeball' Outdoor Game
'Coo' Outdoor Game
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Hathaways Online Funny File
The Funny File is a place for anything silly, creative, fun to do, or just flat out pointless made by the Hathaways. For example outdoor games, three part stories, riddles, etc. Have something to add to the funny file? Contact Shelly.
Updated 05.01.05 'Skunk Spoiled Apples' 3 Part Story
There once lived a mountain man named Burly Bob. His favorite thing to do was to explore the mountains. One day Burly Bob came across a skunk in the forest. He quickly turned around and ran away. When he stopped he realized the skunk was following him. (written by Jake) Now Burly Bob didn't know what else to do but run down to the Jenkings farm and ask his friend Edd, a field hand on the farm how to get rid of the skunk. Years back Edd worked for the Circus. He worked ith all sorts of animals. a skunk wouldn't be to hard for him to deal with, surely. As he reached the farm he found Edd stomping around in anger and chicking good apples to the ground. Burly Bob called out, "Help Edd! I need to get rid of a skunk!" "I have bigger problems," Edd said, "I don't get enough money for this darn apple picking job. Il'm so mad at farmer Jenkins! Hey," Edd said, "Lets use that skunk to stink up the apples! They'll all shrivel and rot!" "Okay." said Burly Bob. So the two started chucking apples at the skunk. When farmer Jenkins came out in the evening Edd hid in a bush. (linked by Shelly) "The apples have all gone bad!" Farmer Jenkins cried in dismay. "It's that darn kid next door, he poisened them. We're ruined!" The field hands watched helplessly as Framer Jenkins threw apple after apple to the ground, all of them ruined. Edd the field hand slipped quietly away into the trees and out onto the highway. He stuffed his hands into his pockets and began to stroll down the road, a grin on his ugly wrinkled face. "That'll teach that Ol' Farmer Jenkins to underpay me," he thought as he walked away laughing to himself. (written by Ria)
Updated 05.01.05 'Sttwwb and the Swamp' 3 Part Story
Kawamo! The humungous oil tanker exploded as the rocket hit it. Sttwwb smirked at having hit his target. Suddenly a car with 5 members or the Mafia started chasing him. Sttwwb grabbed the back of a nuclear warhead just before it took off. Now all he had to do was to climb onto the bottom of the warhead and reprogram it. Of course, he still had his trusty parachute with him, so he wasn't afraid. (written by Jake) Suddenly Sttwb realized there was a timer on the warhead. 5-4-3-2-Sttwwb tugged his parachute cord. BOOM! Just above Sttwwb's head it exploded. Sttwwb gracefully floated to the ground. But where was he? The nuclear warhead had taken him far from his original position. He looked around and realized he was in a swamp! "Psss..." Sttwwb whipped around. "Hide! The terrible Swamp creature is about! You're in danger." "Danger?! Sttwwb yelled, "You don't know anything about-" Sttwwb's words were cut off. A giant monster leaped out of the bushes and closed it's teeth around Sttwwb's body. Blood flew in all directions. In an instant the swamp creature had divoured him. This was the end of unbeatable Sttwwb. The creature turned to the girl. Her name was Jamie.(linked by Shelly) NOOO!!! Jamie screamed, GET AWAY FROM HERE!! The creatures yellow dripping eyes looked startled for a moment... only for a moment, but that was all the time Jamie needed to pick up her sword and swing it as hard as she could at the lurching slimy swamp monster. squish! Right into the blubbering green stomach- and oh what a smell! Huge blobs of slurpy guts and tangled intestines came splurting out of themassive stomach. With a great sloshing sploosh the creature fell backwards into the swamp never to be seen again. Jamie was of course hailed as a hero for soaring the town from the terrible creature of the swamp.(written by Ria)
Updated 05.01.05 'The Ghost of Smorgus Dohlman' 3 Part Story
There was a stringe chill in the air. The Jackson house was old and creepy, and at this time of night it was a well known fact to be haunted by the ghost of Mary Dohlman. She was murdered in the living room by her ex-husband in 1918. It was most unfortunate foir Billy that this house was picked as the location for initiation into the local gang he longed to be a member of. He crept slowly up the walk as the other boys giggled and pointed at his obvios fright. (written by Shelly) Slowly and carefully, Billy crept through the old house, soon arriving at his destination; old Mary Dohlman's room. After closing the door behind him, he began to hear shrieks and the sound of broken glass. Suddenly two ghosts flew into the room. "Mary, make me my dinner or I'll kick you into the next decade!" Billy now realized that the ghost who was yelling was Smorgus, Mary's husband.(linked by Jake) So without a word, Smorgus chucked the brick through the old lady's front window. A blood curdling scream rang out from the house- But alas, to his horror, Smorgus realized that the scream was his own. Only then did it occur to him the real danger of time travel. In the next instant, Smorgus dissapeared from existance. THE END (written by Chas)
Updated 05.01.05 'Judy's Decision' 3 Part Story
Once upon a time there was an old Math teacher named Mr. Bugle. Mr. Bugle was a fine old mathe teacher with a PHD in calculius. Mr. Bugle had a problem, however. He couldn't write the number 13. Whenever he tried to write it, it came out looking like a 'B' or an and sign (&). Mr. Bugle...(written by Chas) ...however had a dautghter named Judy who was fantastic at writing the number 13. Mr. Bugle always had Judy to write his 13s for him. The only problem was theat Mr. Bugle and his daughter Judy lived in Africa, and Judy didn't really care for Africa with all it's lions and giraffes and nasty things like that. "But Judy," Mr. Bugle would say, "If you leave Africa, who will write my thirteens for me?" It went on like this for awhile until,...(linked by Ria) ...one day, when she was at a basketball game, she met someone named Mayble. Mayble said she had just arrived home from France. While she was there, she had stayed the night at a huge hotel called The Royal. She decided, however, that her home in Africa was better than France.(written by Jake)
Updated 05.01.05 'The Mighty Hero of Ireland' 3 Part Story
(On this occation, all of us used the theme "Ireland") Long ago on the green hills of Ireland there lived a wee man with a tangly beard. He had amny a nephew and neice but not a single child to call his own. The only thing in his life that kept him smiling was the wee grey cat that wandered up his porch just after evening supper. "Aye! My what a fine evening in be, little kitten," he would always say as the cat jumped on the man's lap. Every night they would watch the sunset together.(written by Shelly) One day, the man saw a tiny person come into his house. "Oy! Get out'er I'll kick yeh out!" "My name is Renny," he said, "I've been sent to stop you from destroying the king's property!" Knowing that the king's property encompassed 1/3 of the great man's yard, he turned to Renny and said, "I took over this land fair and square." The two began to fight, one with a broom and one with a bow and arrow. Finally, the giant, grey bearded man fled.(linked by Jake) And so thus ended the time of darkness. Evil was swept from the face of the Earth and the giants banished from Ireland forever. No one was more excited that our hero little Renny, who of course was crowned prince at the great feast of light. And that was the 1st day of the 1st Spring that ever was.(written by Maria)
Updated 05.01.05 'How well do you know us?' Trivia Game
Here's a Fun little Trivia Game we made up about ourselves during Family Home Evening. How well do you know the Hathaways? Well, here you can find out. Each of us have thought up some things about ourselves that we don't think others would know. So have guessing, and If you have questions about yourself you would like added here, email me. All family members are more than welcome to do so. Probably the best way to do this is to write down your answers on a paper and then click the link below to find out if your right. Have fun!
Updated 05.01.05 'What do these things have in common?' Riddles
Riddles made up by the Hathaways. After Family Home Evening when we made up the Trivia Game, we made up another game and created some fun riddles while doing it. The best way to do this is to get a peice of paper and write the answers down as you go, then click on the link below to see if your right. Enjoy!
1. Updated 12.25.04 'What am I?' Rhyming Christmas Riddles by Shelly
Here are some more Riddles written by Shelly for Ria's Christmas Riddle book. Try and figure out what each Rhyme is describing. Have fun!
Thanks for visiting. For questions, suggestions, or simply if you have something silly to say, contact webmaster Shelly Hathaway. Copied Right by Hathaway Productions Inc. 2004 |
